Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
7/10，分些些虚高了。
喜欢的，四星主要是都是方言削弱了我一部分理解。片子的小东西太多了，比如红拂夜奔，比如男孩美妆博主，比如三个女人第一次偶遇吃饭，比如充满哲学的修鞋匠，比如白辛苦不辛苦，比如三个人在画展厅的那场戏。嬉笑怒骂间好像没说什么又好像什么都说了。说爱情又不完全是爱情，我理解的是爱和情。白辛苦一场，但只要是自己想的，那就不辛苦。老乌故事中的女主角是谁早已不重要了，重要的是一定有那么一个人在你的内心深处。本片的女性群像刻画的相当丰满，对于男女性的探讨有深度又不冒犯。影片最后投影的灯光打在荧幕上，像在看电影，像在看你。
重点在于展示出了一种不被传统羁绊的新的中年模式。
啊张芝华！每次去上海好像都是住类似的地方……想起最后一次去上海也还是和某老师一起去的。。。电影很不错了，看得很开心，觉得每个女生的白眼都翻得超好的！
小而美的海派想象，可貴的幽默感讓作品顯得輕盈不離地。喜歡蘇北人驅趕自行車和老白李小姐天台抽香煙。老烏去世以後的20分鐘感覺有點沒必要。
电影院看了不到十分钟我就想跑，也真的不喜欢听上海话… 还好奇怎么大家看起来都那么富裕，有几首歌蛮好听，但总觉得切入的特别生硬
全中国也就只有上海人还能负荷这个程度的精神世界了。没有精神世界的人是没有爱情的，更没有爱情神话。
未来也许自己也会在饭桌上给后辈讲述自己的"爱情神话"，再掺点虚构，但谁会在意故事的真假呢？
后半段绕进索菲亚罗兰里去了 由轻反重 堪称败笔了 整体上借力上海腔调 看得到灵光 温柔 平和 和一点点神性 佳作！
我真的不想看三个美女爱上一个这种男人啊。老说给中年女演员机会是对的，因为这种男演员机会也太多了。
《北京遇上西雅图》系列3《上海遇上罗马城》
“你真变态”（划掉）——→“你真可爱”
精致的像是一个网红书店，虽然有很多好的设计，但总体上怎么都喜欢不起来，一股劣质电视剧的味道
片中马伊琍、吴越、倪虹洁饰演的三位女性，性情不同，各有代表性，但都有程度不同的现代底色。从女性角度来看，这片有值得探讨的地方。对于影迷，专属梗不少。片名、片子的确和费里尼那部《爱情神话》有千丝万缕的关系。承担女神符号和欲望投射对象的，是意大利国宝女星。
近两年在影院看过最喜欢的电影，有种国片有救了的感觉 ps表白无双姐姐
开始以为是爱情片，总体看下来才发现是我想得太简单了。电影有一种作者型电影的味道，可能因为导演是新导演加上年纪不大，对各种流量密码运用得贴切又搞笑，一点都不流俗还夹杂着一种本土时尚，全片的吴侬软语非常有特点，中间插几句普通话，那种幽默的感觉自然而然的就冒了出来，片中的各类主演也选得很贴切，徐峥演这类生活类的角色也很顺手，最厉害的是电影中完全不避讳各个年龄段生活中面对的各类问题，还有各种自我讽刺。导演在电影里带了太多小心思，大家看的时候，肯定能有很多小惊喜。这种电影太适合圣诞节去看了，自己，朋友，恋人都适合的那种。
看完不得不感叹，也许能在影像里把女人和男人表现得那么有特色又有情有义的，只有上海了吧。
把爱情里的矫揉造作、瞻前顾后、欲拒还迎、点到为止都讲了个遍，腔调拿捏的恰到好处，既世俗又灵气，最好的是跳出爱情电影悲喜的窠臼，看是讲爱情，其实都是生活，没有实话，不如吃吃点心。剧里的每个演员都爱，真好，有这样的剧给他们发挥
观感全程轻松惬意，市井气息和小资情调相得益彰，对白处处彰显生活的精髓和真谛，几段人物关系和情感也相当深刻铭心，还有方言魅力的加成，不愧为年度惊喜。
以一己之力拯救了几近凋零的2021中国院线片
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